For a Good Cause...
Of Birthdays, Cruelty, and Weird Paranoia
0 violent reactions From the nonsensical thoughts of your DramaQueen at 6:12 PMI really don't have much to say. I just needed to do something to make myself forget that I'm extremely hungry. Hey, you would be if you hadn't eaten breakfast and lunch and snacks in between. I'm not starving myself, not consciously anyway.
Kik's having her 4th Birthday party and I kinda walked out of it because one: clowns still freak me out and two: apparently, today's breed of clowns do not shut up and let the guests eat.
So well, anyhoo, I realized that I have been the most counterproductive person in the planet and in order to fix that, I decided to go to this seminar my aunt told me to go to... She came in my room Thursday night while I was in the middle of killing evil thingies in Diablo2 [yes, I know, it's a little outdated but it's what I found in my desktop. Besides, it beats getting bored] and told me of the seminar, that I should go, that I should learn something about meat processing. I nodded and said yes the manner of a ten year-old in the middle of thumbing through his Gameboy or PSP or whatever it is kids have these days.
I got there [The venue was CICC, by the way. The Building of Lobbies because that's all there is in there] and I was Angel Cortes, Culinary Student. Cool. DreamComeTrue for like an hour or so.
I reached the Registration Booth and found my new hero, heroine, whatever.
Registration Lady: "Excuse me, how old are you?"
Angel: "huh? 18... [flashing a saccharine smile that would make cherubs jealous]"
RL: "You're so cute!"
A: "Thank you... [still flashing the smile]"
I found her pretty. I'm not being biased here, she really was pretty. My new idol. Lol.
It wasn't until I got into the seminar [I was about 45 minutes late, as usual.] that I fully realized that it was about Meat Processing. Like, grinding, chopping, KILLING poor defenseless animals. Kinda felt awkward.
Twenty minutes into the seminar, I started to doodle. [I really should practice sketching again, the drawing sucked big time] The girls beside me were taking notes and stuff, trying to act as if they were paying attention, which made me conclude that they were students. Hahaha.
So well anyway, I'm having a blast being an engineer in Kyla's gift from my sister...
Ciao for now.=)
Happy Birthday, Princess Mikyla.=) i love you!
Kyla playing with her birthday gift
Is there such a thing as an Artist’s block?
I mean writers have the infamous Writer’s Block, why can’t artists have one? Lol.
I’m probably just stressing over the fact that I haven’t doodled, sketched or painted in what feels like decades. Not that I think my drawings are good or anything, it was kinda nice when I drew… stuff. Kind of makes you forget about your problems. It was one way to keep myself busy or whatever, to keep me from “drawing” on myself.
It was probably why most artists went crazy.
It’s probably why I AM crazy…
I keep thinking of what I did to change things. As far as I’m concerned, I’m still depressed, still bored, still tired and I’m still messed up… so why can’t I pick up the pencil and draw something… or anything?
So well anyhoo, here I am staring at an empty page in my sketchpad, hoping that this would pass or whatever.
Gloomy Sunday on repeat
0 violent reactions From the nonsensical thoughts of your DramaQueen at 3:57 PMit's one of those moments [again] when i'm absolutely depressed and i have no idea why. i self-diagnosed myself last night, might be suffering from bipolar disorder. i have the symptoms and all that crap, 'cept for the hallucination part... so i probably don't suffer from it... yet. anyhoo, will keep you guys posted once i get hallucinations. hopefully, i'll recognize them to be imaginary.
[after thought: what if i'm already having hallucinations and i just can't tell? haha]
so well anyway, discovered that the urban legend of Gloomy Sunday isn't true... i've been listening to it on repeat... it's the Billie Holiday version. perhaps it'll work if i listened to the other versions.
the legend goes that if you listen to it, you'll commit suicide afterwards... and i'm still alive. still wussy 'cause she can't kill herself. whatever. i'm a messed up kid and i don't even know why.
are there any therapists in the house? haha
more later. i'm going to sleep. if you want to learn more about gloomy sunday, just google it. it's also called the hungarian suicide song...
ciao my luvs
"i'm tired of staring at the sun..."
0 violent reactions From the nonsensical thoughts of your DramaQueen at 3:42 PMI skipped work [again]. been skipping it for 5 days now and i'm still hoping i DON'T get fired. hahaha.
Decided to write about a band/artist that the golden ipod chooses because the itunes is on shuffle... haha. i'm bored, what did you expect? haha
and the winner is...
*drumroll*
ROOSTER. come get some is playing...
so history of why i downloaded this song. wait, i didn't download this. it came with the c.d. thingy mcdonald's was selling. male, best, whatever thingy c.d.
i remember good charlotte was there. annnddd.. switchfoot?
anyhoo, i first knew about the band because of the "Staring at the Sun" video
i remember that in high school, i had the biggest crush on Nick. haha. i remember talking to ives, who was Cams to me back then, about the band [and how cute nick's eyes were, and how cute Nick was, in general. haha] when the Staring at the Sun video came out.
they were kind of a big thing in Asia. They toured everywhere but here.=( haha...
*Staring at the Sun
*Come Get Some
*Deep and Meaningless
i think the band had a life of two years, then they disbanded like most bands do... kinda sad. but the guys are doing pretty well. i think nick's going solo and Dave has his own band.
there's really nothing more i can say about the band. haha. i loved them when they were together. check their myspace page if you wanna learn more about them.
here's the Come Get Some video
ciao kids. 'till next time..=)
bored/board work...
0 violent reactions From the nonsensical thoughts of your DramaQueen at 10:51 PMi'm bored. And slightly sleepy…
Decided to post a survey here because i'm trying not to flood the bulletin in friendster with my junk. haha.
Name one person who made you smile last night.
++Nikki. hahaha. A daily dose of that kid would cure wrinkles, trust me... hahaha
What were you doing at 8:00 this morning?
+Got out of the shower. haha
What were you doing 30 minutes ago?
+i dunno. Reading this incredibly funny list of call center bloopers. You guys should read it…
http://www.istorya.net/forums/index.php/topic,127321.0.html
What was something that happened to you in 2006?
+I dunno… wait… how old was I? I think I graduated from high school…
What is the last thing you said aloud?
+“hi da” to my dad… he just got home…
How many different things did you drink today?
+water.coke. 2?
What color is your hairbrush?
+blue? Or is it green? I’m not sure… hehe
What was the last thing you paid for?
+I forgot… it’s been a long time since I’m saving my money…
Where were you last night?
+at home… I’m a good little girl, what do you expect? hahaha
What color is your front door?
+brown?
Where do you keep your change?
+in my purse…
What is the weather like today?
+HUMID. I hate the summer weather… I wish it’d rain everyday…
What is the best ice cream flavor?
+Strawberry… or vanilla…
What is something you are excited about?
+nothing…?
Do you want to cut your hair?
+naaah…
Are you over the age of 25?
+nope…
Do you talk a lot?
+Yeah. Pretty much. It’s like I don’t have an “off” button… hahaha
Do you watch The O.C.?
+Yeah, I do…
Do you know anyone named Steven?
+Yeah…
Do you make up your own words?
+I used to when Kaka [cool 3 year old cousin] talked gibberish… she was a couple of months old then…
Are you typically a jealous person?
+yeah.. hahaha. But don’t tell anyone… hahaha
Name a friend whose name starts with the letter "A":
+Aphrodite. Hi lola.. hahaha
Name a friend whose name starts with the letter "K":
+Kimmie…
Who's the 1st person on your received calls list?
+Wait… Lemme check… uhhh… it’s my twin… I think this was the day he was supposed to buy me ice cream, which he never gave me… until now. hahahaha
What did the last text message you received say?
+it’s dangee’s good night message…
Do you chew on your straws?
+if it’s one of those straws that come with juice in tetra packs… haha
Do you have curly hair?
+yeah, I do…
Where is the next place you're going?
+the bed.=)
Who is the rudest person in your life?
+I can’t remember… hahaha
What is the last thing you ate?
+fish. Sorry, fishie… sorry, Buddha…
Is marriage in your future?
+I have no idea. hahaha
What is the best movie you've seen in the past two weeks?
+nooonnnneee. The movies that are out suck… I'm waiting for The Other Boleyn Girl to come out
Is there anyone you like right now?
+I like… I don’t know… As of this moment, no one… I need a crush… hahahaha
When was the last time you did the dishes?
+I forgot…
Are you currently depressed?
+I always am, always will be…
Did you cry today?
+No…
Why did you answer and post this?
+Because I was bored. And sleepy… hahaha
Tag 5 people who would do this survey :
+no idea… people don’t even read my blog… hahahaha…
impermanence is extremely underrated
0 violent reactions From the nonsensical thoughts of your DramaQueen at 7:00 PMi find it irritating that some people just manage to put stupid grins on their faces when my world is falling apart. i know. how horrible of me, right?
you better get used to it then..
so maybe i am jealous. i'm jealous of the fifty million people out there who are happy. i'm jealous of the twenty million out there who have extremely kick-ass good karma.
i guess i was right when i placed all my hopes and dreams in a box. hoping really doesn't do any good for me, does it? for all the mornings of the past two years, i've been expecting each day to be worse than the day before. kinda stopped doing that when i started smiling again.
all i'm ever going to get in this life are temporary highs. i'm never gonna be happy. i know that now. thank you, world, for making EVERYTHING suck...
Posts
